What to know about parental alienation

When you find yourself embroiled in a child custody dispute, you should be able to rely on fair presentation of the evidence and a judicial determination based on your child’s best interests. But while the law seeks to provide fair outcomes that support the best interests of children, sometimes parents do everything they can to tip the scales in their favor in a custody battle, even if at the expense of their own child. This is what happens when parental alienation is in play.

What is parental alienation?

Parental alienation is more than just a child independently deciding they prefer one parent over the other. It is a situation that occurs when one parent manipulates their child into turning the child against the other parent. The parent who initiated the alienation then tries to use the child’s statements about and behaviors toward the other parent to support a custody modification request. If you’re on the receiving end of parental alienation, then you could find yourself backed into a corner with your relationship with your child and the time that you spend with them on the line.

Fortunately, Virginia’s courts are becoming savvier in handling cases of parental alienation. That said, you’ll still need to be prepared to present concrete evidence to support your position. Therefore, it’s imperative that you know how to identify signs of parental alienation.

Common signs of parental alienation

There are several indicators of parental alienation that you should be on the lookout for as you develop your case. They include:

• Your child’s unrelenting criticism of you and your family.
• Unwavering support for the alienating parent.
• A disregard for the facts.
• Statements that use language beyond your child’s age and development.
• Knowledge of intimate details of your relationship with the other parent or information that you confided in the other parent at some time in the past.
• The other parent blocking contact with the child.
• The other parent scheduling fun activities for your child at a time when you’re supposed to be visiting with them.
• False allegations of abuse or neglect.
• The presentation of false memories.
• A lack of information about your child’s schooling, extracurricular activities, and medical appointments.

Any one of these can be indicative of parental alienation, but in many instances, you’ll see several of them. And if you do spot them, then you need to act to bring the alienation to a stop. After all, unchecked, this manipulation can cause significant harm to your child.

How do you stop parental alienation?

It’s likely going to take legal action and therapeutic services. If you suspect that parental alienation is occurring in your situation, then be sure to gather persuasive evidence that supports your arguments. Your own testimony can be helpful, but you’ll also want accounts from other witnesses, especially if they’re unbiased.

You could also request a child custody evaluation where a neutral third-party, typically a mental health professional, interviews the parties and collateral contacts, reviews pertinent records and observes parenting time to make a custody recommendation to the court. Text messages, social media posts, and voicemails can all be powerful evidence, too. Just make sure you’re as diligent as possible and consider securing an expert to help you educate the court on parental alienation.

Are you ready to fight to protect your child’s best interests?

If so, then now is the time to start building your parental alienation case. We know that can be stressful to think about under the circumstances, but you have to be proactive if you want to protect your child’s wellbeing. But this isn’t a process that you must face alone. You can seek out any guidance and support that you may need along the way so that you can increase your chances of securing the outcome that’s right for you and your child.